Why do people think that women don’t get selectively horny? Like straight up, answer quickly.
When I say selectively horny, I mean that we don’t have standards for what turns us on. Can I appreciate a fine man? Yes, but please do not think that being physically attractive will be enough for everybody and their mother to drop their panties. I’m a sapiosexual anyway.
It’s bizarre how explaining that I don’t want to have casual sex. Not just because it’s immoral, but because I’d rather be happy knowing that I had sex with the husband that God has for me. Not judging those that have casual sex or those that have had sex and are celibate, that’s your sin to lay at the altar. However, not every virgin woman is a prude. Heck, I saw a fine man at a grocery store once and had to check myself real quick.
Sex is something I appreciate as a science and as an art form. The oxytocin released from skin to skin contact, the beauty of foreplay, the fluid paintings that are created after such hard work. There’s love put into it. It’s an art piece, and I don’t feel like it’s a bad thing for wanting to wait for the perfect canvas.
This makes me think of RAYE’s song “Buss It Down”. In it, she details how she’ll do exactly what the title says once she meets the right man to do it for. Hearing this said by a black woman is refreshing, because yes, I am 100% the person that will whine my waist on the kitchen floor and will more likely than not still do it after I meet the sole man who will enjoy the performance.
Much like Janelle Monae’s portrayal of engineer Mary Jackson in the movie “Hidden Figures”, I have the right to see fine in every colour…and I exercise that right quite often. Pretty much everyone in my general friend group is sick of me because it seems like my type is all over the place, and there are correct. Yes my type goes from Peso Pluma to Ross Lynch and then you could sprinkle a bit of Dave East in there, and what about it? Throw in some Alton Mason and Mark Lee while you’re at it.
Now as much as I rant to my friends about it being hard to find a man I like emotionally in my city, I definitely have no issue finding one that is easy on the eye (I sound like a grandma and I’m only 19…chile anyways). It’s honestly crazy to me as to how within the span of me finally becoming a semi-adult that I have seen plenty of men that I know would sound better if they talked between my legs like the lyrics to a Måneskin song but none that I would genuinely listen to on a regular day. While I’m not actively dating at the moment (per the Lord’s instructions, not mine), I will not sit here and say that I don’t look forward to the day I have sex. I know someone just cringed reading that line, but hear me out real quick.
I look forward to in a way of feeling the emotional connection between a husband and wife. Yes, I’m aware that marriage is way more than an excuse to have sex. I’m a former psychology major who was planning going into marriage and sex counselling for crying out loud. With that being said though, I look forward to the thrill or the lack of it. The lazy enthrals of the morning to the borderline animalistic ones of the night, even the ones that make you learn a bit about yourself. I view it as romantic. Little pockets of passion to remember and fantasise about. I love that idea.
There’s nothing wrong with waiting for the right one! I think terms like “prude” and “slut” are so nondescript. Human sexuality is complex and people need to mind their own business!